Brené Brown says, “Expectations are resentments under construction.”

Maybe you are tired of the year-after-year routine? Obligatory decorations and parties? The same soundtrack everywhere you go? If you are following the holiday script and it’s not something you want or enjoy, it feels like drudgery with resentment not far away.

I am here to tell you: It’s OK. And you know what else? You don’t have to do any of it.

You don’t have to:

• shop
• listen to holiday songs
• put up a tree or lights
• bake cookies
• wrap things in ribbons and bows
• prepare a multi-course meal
• set a Martha Stewart-certified dining table
• watch the same TV specials that have been on every year since you were born
• travel
• or even like the holidays.

Many holiday traditions are so ingrained in our culture that we tell ourselves we have to do them. But really, do you? Is anyone, literally, forcing you?

Saying “I have to” renders you powerless. You set yourself up as a victim of a self-created, overpowering force that robs you of free will.

Try changing “I have to” to “I choose to” and see how each task feels. Is it something you actually want to choose?

Perhaps, as you consider your list of have-to/choose-tos, you may be thinking: But what about my children/family/neighbors? If I don’t ____ their holiday will be ruined.

That’s a backdoor “I have to.” The thing is, the greatest gift you can give anyone—you, your kids, the world—is a happy you. All the bows and bling in the world can’t make up for a tired, stressed, grumpy you.

If you want to enjoy the holidays, start creating a holiday you can enjoy in two steps:

1. Do more of what you like

2. Do less of what you don’t like

It’s pretty simple—and radical. It might feel a little scary to consider bucking the familiar holiday traditions. But doing less of what you don’t like doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t take part at all.

Try applying the 3 B’s to your have-tos: bag it, barter it, better it.

Bag it: For the things you absolutely don’t want to and don’t choose to do. Choose to not do it. Then don’t do it. Period.

Barter it: Get someone else to do it for you by trading tasks or paying.

Better it: How you can make the task better? (Schedule it first thing in the morning? Do it with a friend? Listen to your favorite music?) Be creative and consider any possibility that makes the task more pleasant/less onerous. As a bonus, give yourself a reward when you finish.

From this point forward, I hereby give you permission to do the holidays differently, to make conscious choices and to be happier, which is the best gift you can give yourself and everyone around you.

The post 2 Steps to Enjoy the Holidays appeared first on TUT.

She was sick and undernourished when we brought her home from the shelter, so we didn’t see her full personality blossom until she became healthier.

And then, no doubt about it, she made herself known.

She wants food? MEOW.

She wants someone to pet her? MEOW.

She wants a human to sit so she can nap on a lap? MEOW.

It’s entertaining living with her. She gets what she wants.

Why does she get what she wants? Because she asks for it.

Even with a limited vocabulary, her requests are clear. There is no beating around the bush. No dropping hints. No waiting for someone to maybe-kind-of notice her. She ASKS.

Where in your life can you be more like Trixie?

In other words, where are you avoiding asking for what you want? Because if you are avoiding, the answer is already, by default, a no.

Avoiding has its roots in a few different internal challenges—which applies to you?

Do you know what you want?

Asking for what you want begins with knowing what you want.

If you’ve been following “the rules” your entire life, looking to others for direction, doing what they say you should do, aiming to meet their definition of success… there’s a good chance you’ve become disconnected from knowing what you want.

This is where you start.

There is a part of you that’s guiding you toward your best life, that knows what you love and what lights you up. It is always guiding you but it doesn’t use words or thoughts, it communicates with you through your body.

Start tuning into these sensations. It’s a bit like playing the warmer/colder game, where someone hides something and you search for it by being told you’re getting warmer when you’re closer to it and you’re getting colder when you’re farther from it.

Notice when you’re feeling warmer (things you enjoy doing) or colder (things that you dread). Pay attention. These signals are guiding you in your right direction.

The conversation will be uncomfortable

This is a big obstacle when it comes to asking for what you want, especially if you’re not used to asking. Your mind starts streaming upsetting thoughts like, what will they say? what will they think of me? what if they say no?? It’s enough to send you hiding under the covers.

The antidote? Get comfortable with being uncomfortable, and ask yourself, what would Trixie do? Because, I promise you, when she asks for attention or food or a lap, she does not give a flip about what I’m thinking of her.

How others should know how to behave

This is a sneaky one because you may not see it operating in your life.

Do you have expectations about how people around you should act? And when they don’t follow these rules, do you feel ignored, unappreciated, rejected, or unloved? It’s not unusual to hold an unspoken set of rules about how you want people to behave.

The key word here is: unspoken. The people whom you are holding to these rules don’t know the rules exist. You may not even know they exist.

For example, you text your sister and she doesn’t reply for a week. If she cared, she would respond in a few hours, right? After all, how long does it take to type “Hey Sis!”?

Or it’s your birthday and your partner doesn’t mark the day the way you want. If he loved you, he would send your favorite flowers, take you out to dinner and give you a perfectly wrapped gift, right?

In both cases you feel hurt, and your sister and your partner are scratching their heads wondering what went wrong.

You think they should just know… but the people around you aren’t mind readers. Use your voice.

The important thing to keep in mind is that you might not get what you ask for. People can say yes, they can say no (or something in between). Like when Trixie asks for food at 4 AM? Not going to happen. But her request is heard, loud and clear (and she gets her food at a more reasonable time in the morning).

Asking is powerful—you become your own strongest advocate, claiming what’s right for you. And that’s the best way to get more help for more of what you want.

When you hem and haw and hint, or just plain hide, you end up waiting and watching the world go by. When you ask, you are far more likely to hear a yes.

The post Why My Cat Gets What She Wants appeared first on TUT.

Does this sound familiar? You go to a holiday family gathering (or maybe you host a family dinner). You so want this year to finally be the year that your family gathers with laughter and good cheer, kind words and camaraderie, togetherness and love for all. It will look like the families you see in holiday catalogs and ads on TV.

This year will be the year that…

…your in-laws can be together for just a few hours without having the same fight they’ve been fighting forever.

…your sister doesn’t roll her eyes at everything you do or say.

…your cousin doesn’t drink too much and rant loudly about politics.

…your father doesn’t sit on the couch the entire time tuned out watching football.

…the kids don’t argue, sulk or meltdown.

Can you picture it? What you wish for every year? Why can’t they be nice just once so you can have the longed-for holiday you want??

Because that’s not who they are.

They’ve shown you who they are, over and over again. If you expect them to be different, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. And you know what? That disappointment is not their fault.

It’s not your family members who are causing your hurt feelings. It’s the story you have about your family members and how they should behave when you spend time with them. You want them to change and become who you think they should be.

There are two problems with this way of thinking:

1) When you hold onto a story about what a holiday family event should look like, you’re arguing with reality because in reality they are who they are, doing what they do. When you argue with reality, you lose every time.

2) You’re outsourcing control over your feelings when you hold others responsible for when you feel bad. This leaves you waiting for and counting on others to make you feel better. That’s going to be a mighty long wait.

This year, how about trying something different?

What if you let them be who they are, and instead you pay attention to who you want to be while with them and the holiday you want to create for yourself?

To be clear, this isn’t about condoning their behavior or tolerating abuse, it’s about ending your inner argument with who they are and dropping the expectations that inevitably lead to frustration.

They can still have their drama and conflict and eye rolls and football trances.

You can show up with laughter and good cheer.

You can offer kind words and camaraderie.

You can hold love for all.

It’s your choice!

The post Who Creates the Holiday You Want? appeared first on TUT.

How is that working for you? If you respond with a fist pump of victory, you’re in the minority (only 8% of people successfully achieve their resolutions).

What’s going on? Why are resolutions so hard to keep?

On the surface, resolutions are all about taking action, meaning: doing something different than you were doing before.

And in most cases you already know what to do to accomplish your resolutions. Let’s say, for example, you resolve to lose weight and organize your garage. How do you lose weight? Eat healthy, exercise more. How do you organize the garage? Get rid of the piles of junk.

So, if you know what you want to accomplish and how to accomplish it, why haven’t you succeeded?

Because doing is the wrong place to start.

It helps if we back up a few steps. Action is motivated by feelings. Feelings result from thoughts. This is the root of why your resolutions go awry.

Trying to jump from your current circumstance (clothes don’t fit, garage is bursting at the seams) to your desired result (you minus 15 pounds, a tidy garage) without addressing the thoughts and feelings that got you where you are means you will meet a mountain of internal resistance that undermines you no matter how enthusiastic you are on January 1.

Chances are that what you resolve to do is not a spur-of-the-moment idea. It’s probably something you’ve been thinking about for a while. Maybe you’ve made it a new year’s resolution before – tried and gave up. This doesn’t mean you’re weak or a failure.

Resolutions (or any goals you set) are about more than just the desired result – they are about who you become in the process of attaining them. This is where your old thoughts trip you up. You may not be aware that they are holding you back, only that another day has gone by and you are on the couch eating leftover cookies from the holiday dessert swap instead of going for a walk or sorting through old boxes of stuff.

This doesn’t mean that resolutions are useless. Research shows that people who make resolutions are 10 times more likely to succeed at their goals than people who don’t make them. But the best predictor of success is how prepared you are before you begin taking action.

If you choose to make a resolution for the new year, don’t rush into action (yet).

Your first step is to prepare by asking yourself:

What would it be like to be someone who does what I want to do?

What does this person do?

What does this person say?

What does this person think?

(Hint: probably not the same as you.)

Take some time with these questions. Your answers will illuminate your resistance and help you see the gap between where you are and where you want to be. It’s here that you set the foundation for becoming the you who succeeds and reaches your goals.

“If all you ever do is all you’ve ever done, then all you’ll ever get is all you ever got.” – an old Texas saying

The post Why Resolutions Fail (and How to Set Yourself up for Success) appeared first on TUT.

“Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.” – Hal Borland

I’m calling bullshit. On the new year.

What we call the “new year” is arbitrary. It’s not actually connected to a natural, seasonal event. January 1st became the first day of the year when Julius Caesar added 67 days to the previous year.

There was a lot of mucking with the calendar in ancient times, whether for political gain or due to incorrect astronomical calculations. There wasn’t a broad consensus on when a new year started – some cultures marked it on the vernal equinox, the autumnal equinox or the winter solstice.

But over the course of millennia, January 1 became firmly cemented as the start of our new year, and with it, the idea that this is the time to remake yourself. Out with the old and in with the new! Bigger and better!! Now or never!!!!

There is something about a crisp, new, blank calendar that gives the feel of a new beginning. But, no matter how you choose to mark the change from one year to the next, the day comes just like any other. And, it turns out, nothing much actually changes. The person you are at 12:01AM on January 1 is the same person you were at 11:59PM on December 31.

As much as you might like there to be a magical transformation that happens – an instantaneous shedding of the emotional baggage you wish you could leave behind, the events you’d like to forget, the people/places/things you’d like to be rid of – it all comes along with you into the new year. And that can leave you with a feeling of deflation when life looks the same on January 2, like the promise of a fresh start has been broken before the year is a week old.

This idea of a fixed ending and beginning repeats every year, and if it works for you, that’s great. But life tends to not be that tidy. The highs and lows of our lives stubbornly resist conforming to the calendar. You may find yourself in the middle of some seriously difficult – or seriously wonderful – circumstances that leave you with little interest in or energy for examining and recalibrating your life.

That’s OK.

If the beginning of January doesn’t coincide with a transition in your life, or you don’t feel the pull of a new beginning, you don’t have to pretend or force it just because the calendar says so (or everyone else is). You have permission to keep on keepin’ on, as you were.

You are not obligated to reflect or review or rewind or revise or resolve, if it doesn’t feel right for you.

Because a time will come when a part of your life does come to an end, and a new phase begins. Or you’ll want to take a look at what’s working (and what isn’t) in your life. Or you’ll start to think about what possibilities lie ahead for you.

No matter when this happens, whether it’s January or July, it’s the right time for you – it’s your new year.

And when you are ready, here are some questions to guide you into your new year:

• Who do you want to be?
• What do you want to do?
• How do you want to feel?
• Is this what you really want?
• What do you want to stop doing over the coming year?
• Imagine yourself at the end of your year – how are you different?
• What advice does the one-year-from-now future-you have for the current you?

The post Calling Bullshit on the New Year appeared first on TUT.

In his line of work, he is often in the position of telling people to break up with their partner. But what the columnist wants to add to his advice (but doesn’t actually say) is: break up with the jerk but don’t tell the jerk that I told you to do that.

He is worried that someday he will run into a guy who got dumped – a guy who is mad and possibly violent.

So, guess what happens?

He is walking down the street and a guy says, you don’t know me but you told my girlfriend to break up with me. This was it – the columnist was ready for this guy to deck him. But instead the guy said, thank you!

Guy had wanted the relationship to end but his girlfriend didn’t, so he stayed in the relationship while also acting like a jerk so she would break up with him.

After hearing this story, I was thinking about the girlfriend. If she didn’t understand this then, I hope she does now: When someone’s words and actions don’t match, trust the actions.

Because actions reflect priorities.

Economists have a term for this: revealed preference. Instead of relying on what people state as their preference, look at their behavior. Because while they say one thing, the choices they make may reveal something else.

Often we hear someone’s words and take them as truth, even as all evidence points otherwise. Words seem clear and are easily interpreted to represent the speaker’s true position. And to be fair, the speaker may in fact be sincere and genuinely want what was said. But people can sometimes feel compelled to say what’s expected, even if it’s not what they want.

When it comes time to back up their words with action, their behavior will reveal their deeper truth. Like someone who says they want to lose weight – they really do! – but doesn’t make any lifestyle changes. Or like the guy who met the advice columnist, he stayed with his girlfriend but his behavior was begging for a break up.

When you are on the receiving end of this pattern – hearing one thing and seeing something else – it can be mighty confusing if you’re focusing just on the words. She said she wants this… so why hasn’t she done anything about it? And maybe you think, I’ll ask her about it again and offer some friendly advice and get her this book/class/helpful product. That will get her on track!

Instead, it gets you a boatload of resentment for your nagging/pushing/micromanaging.

Rather than arguing over the issue, ask yourself:

• What does this person say?
• How does this person behave?
• Are their actions aligned with their stated position?

If words and actions are at odds, you know how to discern what their real preference is. It’s been revealed. Their actions are telling you loud and clear.

The post Recognizing the Truth When Words and Actions Don’t Match appeared first on TUT.

But first, I heard the washing machine beep that it’s finished so I’m just going to take care of that load of laundry. And my plants need watering – it would be irresponsible to neglect them. And, before I forget, I need to look up that thing someone told me about. And the book I ordered – shouldn’t it have arrived by now? I’m just going to check the tracking number. Oh wait – did I forget to put the next load of laundry in the washer? Duh. I better run downstairs and do that. OK, all set now. Hang on, was that my phone buzzing?

Gaaaaah!

That’s a bit of an exaggeration, but those are all things I’ve done when I’ve had something more important to do. Can anyone relate? One distraction after another, a series of non-urgent tasks prioritized so that you’re doing without getting anything significant done. Then you wonder, where did the time go? I was so busy.

Busy doing what? Let’s look closer at that question.

On the surface, it looks like someone who procrastinates is simply lazy or unmotivated or undisciplined, frittering away their time. If only the procrastinator would just buckle down, get organized, focus, try harder and stop fooling around then work would get done.

But the “lazy theory” doesn’t hold up, because procrastinators don’t procrastinate in every area of their lives. They are motivated to do and to accomplish without hesitation in areas of their interest, like hobbies or sports.

So, what’s going on?

When it comes to completing tasks and meeting deadlines, procrastination is not the problem. Procrastination is a symptom of a deeper issue – a conflict between taking action on a task and resisting that action.

It’s an inner battle of “I have to” vs “I don’t want to.” Procrastination becomes a coping mechanism, a way to avoid dealing with the conflict and the underlying emotions that fuel the resistance.

With this understanding, you can see why buckling down and trying harder isn’t going to help. Extra effort will be met with extra resistance, leading to anxiety, frustration, overwhelm, shame and an even stronger desire to escape. All of which reinforces a sense of being chronically incapable. Why even bother then? Might as well keep procrastinating.

To break the cycle of procrastination, the key is understanding what is causing your resistance. There is a part of you saying (or maybe screaming) “I don’t want to!” and what you want to understand is, why?

It could be a fear of criticism, or not feeling good enough, or that perfection is the only option. Or it could be that deep down you know you’re following a path that isn’t right for you and you’re doing something against your will.

When you find yourself procrastinating, ask yourself these questions:

What action am I avoiding?

What thoughts do I have about the task?

When I think about the task, how do I feel?

Discovering the underlying fuel for your procrastination provides you with an important tool: awareness. You can’t change what you don’t recognize. As you answer these questions, you’ll begin to see the patterns and reactions that become your fast track to procrastination.

This is where your freedom from procrastination begins – leading you to reconnect to your innate ability to create, produce and accomplish.

The post What You Need to Know to Stop Procrastinating appeared first on TUT.

In one episode in which he was counseling members of the studio audience, a woman was distraught that her children would be spending Christmas with their father, her ex-husband. The day would be absolutely unbearable for her without her children. Dr. Phil began his advice by telling her to stop catastrophizing the situation.

That word has stuck with me since, memorable in how vividly the sense of catastrophic disaster is linked to our capacity to intensely imagine and anticipate. This is a word worth knowing and understanding.

Cognitive distortions are ways that our mind convinces us to believe something that isn’t really true, and catastrophizing is a common one. It’s the mental habit of overreacting and exaggerating a situation to imagine the worst possible outcome.

Whether or not there is an actual catastrophe on the horizon (and usually, there isn’t) the habit of catastrophizing creates undue anxiety, undermines self-confidence and reinforces a perception of victimhood.

To understand catastrophizing, it helps to understand a peculiarity about how our brain evolved. Our brain has a “negativity bias” which means that negative experiences have a stronger impact on our psyche than positive experiences.

This makes sense from an evolutionary perspective – scanning for and quickly identifying threats was important for our ancestors’ survival when saber-toothed tigers roamed outside the cave. But in our modern world this inclination can be over-sensitive in situations that are not so life-threatening.

Catastrophizing is the negativity bias run amok. Minor or moderate challenges snowball in your mind to become nightmare scenarios that often lead to an end point where you lose everything and live out of a shopping cart on the street.

It’s a way to try to exert control when you feel like you don’t have much. You think you’re being practical, but this type of thinking only sees the worst possible outcome. It perpetuates anxiety and misses the range of options that are possible and resources that are available.

How do you begin to break the habit of catastrophizing?

Catch yourself in the act

You may not realize how often you catastrophize because it happens so fast. A problem comes up and almost instantly your mind jumps to disaster. Awareness is key to breaking the habit. Start to notice when you’re escalating into the zone of catastrophe.

Breathe

Take some slow, deep breaths (try for 10). This calming response is so simple it’s easy to underestimate how powerful it is. Slow, deep breathing signals to your body that you are not, in fact, under threat.

Expand your range of possibilities

When you catastrophize you only see the most wildly negative outcomes. What are alternative possibilities? Turn your attention away from the negative by making a list of potential neutral and positive outcomes.

Talk back to the negative thoughts

How many times have your imagined dire scenarios actually come to pass? My hunch is very few or, more likely, never. Ground yourself in the truth of your actual experiences and give yourself reasons why the worst scenario won’t happen.

Prepare

What reasonable steps can you take to reduce the likelihood of an unpleasant outcome? The key word here is: reasonable. Learning to trust that you’ll be OK even if things don’t go your way will help you to focus less on negative outcomes. Practice, rehearse, ask a trusted friend for help or advice – these are a few steps you can take to prepare for your big moment.

Catastrophizing serves no useful purpose – it only keeps you feeling bad about yourself and your ability to navigate your life. By breaking this habit you’ll begin to shift your perspective to see your circumstances more clearly: your world is not always teetering on the edge of disaster and you can move forward and take on challenges that inevitably come up.

With patience and practice, you’ve got this!

The post How to Stop Thinking the Worst and Start Feeling Better appeared first on TUT.

1. I don’t know
2. Whatever you want is fine
3. *shrug*
4. All of the above

In fact, how many times does that happen? Someone asks want you want and you say “whatever…” and default to their preference.

Avoiding decisions is a way of hiding.

You avoid asserting what’s important to you, what you value, what you want. You keep going along, same old same old. And you end up letting others – people and circumstances – run your life.

It’s time to start making decisions.

Making a decision is powerful. The origin of the word decide means to “cut off”. Deciding means taking a stand, saying yes to something and, by doing so, saying no to something else.

If you’ve been shrinking from decisions for a while, deciding can feel uncomfortable. Deciding means:

• declaring a preference … what if someone doesn’t approve of my choice?
• accountability … what if I make a mistake?
• cutting off options … what if I regret my choice?
• taking responsibility for steering the direction of your life … what if I get it wrong??

Those nagging, negative, critical thoughts are a sign that fear is ramping up. Fear prefers the status quo, creating as much resistance as possible to keep you from doing anything different. It’s true, someone might not approve or a decision might not turn out the way you expect, but that doesn’t mean you collapse back into inaction.

Decision-making takes practice.

It’s a skill you develop and a lesson in trust. Every time you make a decision, you learn about yourself. You discover what you want, how to speak for yourself, how to become the leader in your life. As a bonus, you build trust in your ability to decide. The more you decide, the more confident you become at decision-making.

If you’re ready to break the habit of indecision, here are some ways to fire up your decision-making:

1. Check in with your body.

You can tap into your body’s guidance to help you discern which course of action to take by paying attention to what Martha Beck (in her book “Steering By Starlight”) calls your shackles on and shackles off reactions.

Imagine choosing the options you’re considering. When you think of each outcome, what do you feel in your body? If you notice that your body becomes tense, tight, constricted or drained – that’s a sign the outcome is not right for you. That’s your shackles on response.

On the other hand, if you notice that your body feels lighter, open, energized or more expansive – that’s your body giving you a yes. That’s your shackles off response. Check for which option feels like shackles off and go in that direction.

2. WWCD?

If you are dealing with a particularly stressful, anxiety-producing decision, ask yourself “What would calm do?”. This question helps to bypass the fear-based chatterbox in your head and access a quieter, deeper, wiser part of yourself.

3. Fear doesn’t get to choose.

How much is fear driving your decision? Is your choice steering you toward what’s best for you or trying to avoid something that might happen? Instead of focusing on fear, ask yourself “What would delight me? What would I love?” Lean towards love rather than away from fear.

Making decisions is like taking the steering wheel of your life. You’re no longer coasting on autopilot… you are consciously and intentionally navigating your own way.

The post How to Break the Habit of Indecision appeared first on TUT.

I can, for a very simple example, confidently tie my shoes. When I’m putting on shoes, I don’t need to think about how confident I am in my ability to tie them, I just do it and carry on with my day.

But when I’m not feeling confident? That’s a different story. The sense of strength and self-assuredness is gone, replaced by doubt and hesitation. I’m distracted with thoughts about how unprepared I am. I want to hide.

It’s so uncomfortable and it’s so familiar. Can you relate?

Confidence is a paradox: we want to feel confident before we do something that feels new and risky, but we only gain confidence by having done it. The confidence we want comes after the action, not before.

At its heart, confidence is really about knowing that we’ll be OK no matter what happens. And when we’re not feeling confident, that’s a sign that fear has kicked into action, causing us to fret about what-ifs.

After all, when I’m tying a shoe, I’m not concerned about the consequences of missing a loop. I know it’s not the end of the world. I just retie the shoe.

But fear doesn’t know the consequences of something we haven’t done before, and it’s trying to keep us safe, so it starts building resistance in the form of insecurity and reluctance. And this resistance can be quite effective, especially if we’re accustomed to backing away when it shows up.

So, what can you do to face the awkward, uncomfortable period of taking action before you feel confident enough to act?

1. Set, go, ready.

If you follow the traditional steps of “ready, set, go” you’ll never get past the first step. Acknowledge that you feel like you’re not ready and be willing to take action anyway.

Your knees may be knocking and your heart racing, and that’s OK. Let your next step be forward.

2. Embrace imperfection.

Let go of any ideas that there is only one way to do this, and it’s beyond your reach. A quest for perfection is just another form of resistance. If you’re holding out until you can do something perfectly, you’ll do nothing.

As G.K. Chesterton said, “If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly.” Release yourself from an unattainable standard so you can start from exactly where you are.

3. Know your “why.”

What is the bigger picture? What is your goal? Your dream? Keep this in mind to motivate you when resistance tries to hold you back. What looks hard now will be worth it when you reach your target.

4. Practice small.

You don’t need to take on your biggest confidence challenges all at once, right away. Take small steps. This is so valuable because you experience completion. Find opportunities that stretch you a little bit outside your confidence comfort zone. You’ll reap the reward of positive feelings from their accomplishment which will help propel you through the next small action.

When you move through resistance-induced discomfort and take action, you gain the benefit of building confidence around that specific skill. But there’s a bonus: each time you take action, you’re also building confidence in your ability to build confidence.

The more you practice, the more confident you’ll become in your ability to step into something new. Watch out world – here you come!

The post 4 Easy Tips For Building Confidence appeared first on TUT.