What feels great today might not strike my fancy at all in the future. I can’t wait to see the newness that shows up tomorrow. Change is my friend.

As I am prone to say, we are all a product of where we’ve been. I am no exception.

I grew up in a family where dinner was served at 6:00 pm. Not 5:59. Not 6:01. Taco Tuesday hadn’t been invented yet, but the fam most definitely embraced Meatloaf Monday.

Our family did things as they had always been done—with the firmly established belief that if there were a better way, they would have found it already. I cannot begin to express how that life made my skin itch.

At the ripe old age of 12, at that aforementioned dinner table, I announced I could not wait to move to New York City. Why NYC? From my adolescent perspective, it was the antithesis of my Kentucky hometown—where being cast from a different mold was…well, unwelcome.

Your penny loafers best be Weejuns, young lady, else’n you’ll never fit in. My hero was a classmate who put string on an oatmeal box and carried it as a purse.

Creating the Change YOU Want
Life promises one thing only: change. The decision is yours. Dilly-dally around and let life pick for you or take charge and make your world all you would have it be.

Let’s say the one thing you know for sure is that you’d like this year to be different. Seems like a great place to start. Let’s do it.

Step One: Think Differently
If you want your life to be different, you need to think and act differently. Can we agree on this starting place? If we keep doing what we’ve always done, we can only expect more of the same. Agreed? Let’s create the change we want to see!

Step Two: Accept the Now
Start with accepting your current circumstances. I cannot overstress the importance of this step. You must embrace your place to start anew. You just happened to have landed here—a stop on the journey to where you want to be.

• Accept that where you are is not who you are.
• Forgive yourself, them, everyone.
• Release any blame/anger/resentment toward yourself or anyone else. (I know. Not easy but crucial.)
• Replace any leftover negative self-talk with a mantra of emotional release. (Something like “I release all emotions that are not in my best interest.”)

Rinse and repeat this process until you have released any and all negative emotions attached to your current life. I mean it. The rest of the steps need you to finish this first.

Step Three: What’s Next?
Prepare to pivot by picking your future. What floats your boat?

• Finding a new job that keeps you challenged?
• Being able to finish that 10K with a smile?
• Adding to your collection of belt buckles from around the world?

Take your time. Make sure it feels right. Pick things that make your heart sing.

Once you’ve finalized your fancy, you can move on. Things will start to change once that decision is made and your intention is set.

Step Four: Open Up
Let’s create a new habit of opening up to all the everything everywhere.

You’ve completed your release, leaving you with an open heart able to embrace a new and exciting existence. The goal is to pay attention to people, places, and things you skipped right over. Become the wide-eyed four-year-old version of yourself—in awe of a world full of wonderous everything everywhere. Think Christmas or birthdays, surrounded by the gifts of life, all yours to enjoy.

If this is new to you, it may take some practice. Try doing what you usually do but in new ways:

• Less autopilot, more in the moment
• Talk less, listen more
• Just say yes to trying something new

You’ll be amazed at what shows up. By widening your scope, you’ll automatically open up to new thoughts, ideas, and adventures. And new is what we’re after. Your open eyes and heart will work miracles when we get to…

Step Five: Take Action
Make a move in the direction of your goal. Any move. Open doors and peek inside. Yes, you can open more than one door, you rule-breaker, you! Don’t like any of the doors? As Mike Dooley says, pick the least sucky ones.

Get the momentum going! Movement is essential. Left foot, right foot. Steps of any size. There’s a reason it’s called “chasing your dreams.”

If you feel lost, take a breath, forgive yourself, and start over.

• Embrace change
• Accept your now
• Stay open to what’s new
• Keep your eye on the prize
• Step to the beat of your new life, enjoying the view

Keep the momentum going and magic will follow. Who knows what may happen next? The fam may start eating dinner at any old time.

The post 5 Steps to Create the Change YOU Want appeared first on TUT.

First, why do you think you’ve settled for less so far? Because of where you were before you got here. The things you soaked up along the way—from people you respected and loved who may or may not have had your best interests at heart. (They didn’t know any better—forgive them.)

The end result? The birth of those little voices—the negative self-talk that says you’re not smart enough, hardworking enough, whatever enough. (I’ve never talked to a woman who didn’t know exactly what I meant when I said “little voices,” so I’ll just leave that here.)

If you’ve mastered those self-limiting beliefs already, then well done you. If you’re still working on your “Living Your Best Life” merit badge—let’s keep going.

How do you define “the best” when it comes to you? Not your kids, students, family, friends. You, my darling. You.

Let’s create a wanna-have list. Write a couple sentences describing your perfect dream world. Let’s take a look. Does your list include the BEST or the OK-FOR-NOW? Is it an I’ll-settle-for-this list?

• A new used car or your dream 1972 Karmann Ghia convertible?
• A day-trip to Bisbee or the Great Migration Safari in Tanzania & Kenya?
• Figuring out a new way to stretch your budget or finishing your master’s degree and getting that promotion?

You don’t have to settle for less than the best just because that’s what you’ve always had.

Each of us, and I mean each of us, creates our own lives. Regardless of what happened before, you can conjure up the life of your dreams—by believing you can do it.

We’re gonna diffuse those joy-sucking, word-bomb little voices right now with the power of affirmations.

I discovered affirmations 20 years ago, and it was life changing. I am not overstating the result. “I am a strong independent woman in charge of my own destiny”landed me smack dab in middle of the “I love my life” zone.

Here’s how you do it.

1. Recognize when the voices hit. Don’t argue. Just pay attention.
2. Respond with your affirmation that kicks that voice to the dust. Say it once. Say it twice. 50 times. As many times as it takes for you to picture and feel the joy—believing, with all your soul, that you have the power to change your life.
3. Make steps towards your goals, never looking back. Any steps. Opening the next door that presents itself. Open all the doors until you find the right one.

Trust me, strong affirmations are all you need. The voices will get fainter and disappear until they have zero power over your righteousness.

You don’t have any affirmations yet? Color that fixed right now. Do your voices have a theme? Let’s start there. You can use an affirmation that addresses each one individually—or a one-size-fits-all plan of attack. Whichever you’d rather.

There are at least 984 websites that list five billion different affirmations. You could start there, but let’s try it another way: Build some just for you. Because if it comes from you, your heart will sing more quickly. And that, my dear, is the point.

The only rule for affirmations is to keep it positive. Meaning leave out no, not, don’t, never.

• Counter “I’m so broke I can’t afford anything” with “Miracles happen every day and financial freedom is mine.”
• Negate “You’re too lazy” with “I love my ability to focus on the task at hand to do things quickly and easily!”
• Tell “Who are you to think you could do that?” to step aside with “I am capable of doing anything I choose on my personal life journey.”

Now let’s add the secret sauce. As you remind yourself of your immeasurable talent and worth, picture and feel the end result of that affirmation.

• Waving your new PhD diploma in the air
• Watching the fam play on that fantastic backyard playground you just built
• Driving off into the sunset with your new sweetheart

The last, most important, dollop of the secret sauce is knowing that your dreams will come true. You don’t have to know how or when. Just keep the faith. Your job is to hold the vision—the universe takes care of the rest.

So, here’s where I leave you today.

Take your time and craft your personally perfect affirmations. Then use them! Apply liberally as needed. No need to worry about an overdose.

When you’ve outgrown them, upgrade—for free! New and improved dreams are yours for the making anytime.

I have complete faith in your dedication to becoming the best and happiest you. And I’m here for you. All the way.

The post How to Live Your Best Life with the Power of Affirmations appeared first on TUT.